MIGRATING MOLES AND FASTENABLE PANTS
Psst… I sent this email out to my list just before I went on my first round of maternity leave in 2021, recently came across it, and thought it deserved to be a blog post.
Well, all of a sudden it’s April, and when strangers ask me when I’m due, I get to say "next month!".
It’s very weird.
Exceptionally exciting.
And means I only have 8 more days of work.
TO THE NAPS!
There are SO MANY thoughts swirling round my noggin at the moment, and I wasn’t *quite* sure which ones to send you…
The funny ones, about slowly unfolding belly buttons and migrating moles and just how much I’m looking forward to wearing pants that fasten again, *or* the deeper ones that sit in what must be a very niche space of pregnant-business-philosophy.
SPOILER ALERT!
I chose the second category, partly because my attempts to shape the first batch of thoughts into an email were largely unsuccessful (although, I *did* find some excellent gifs…) and partly because right at this moment, I find myself in a very strange in-between—
So unbelievably excited to meet this little human and to have the privilege of knowing them as they grow into who they’ll be, but also very content to have this last little window of:
taking myself to the movies
eating things that require two hands
having showers that are *slightly* too long to be environmentally friendly
leaving the house spontaneously (although, the literal hill we live on top of is getting harder and harder to climb!), and
more or less being in control of my days
Part of me thinks I’ll love being a parent, since I get bored pretty quickly if there’s nothing in my life that’s challenging me, but *another* part of me thinks I might find it completely overwhelming because I won’t be able to strategize myself out of everything—
Cluster feeds, poo-splosions, or two-year-olds, for example—
And I wonder if I’ll find that intensely frustrating.
A lot of this fear comes from the fact I don’t (and can’t possibly) know the full breadth of what life as a parent will mean, and therefore don’t yet have the skills I’ll need to find my way.
And, look—
My only real expectations for this whole parenting thing are that:
I won’t know what the feck I’m doing about 92% of the time
It will require more of me than I yet know how to give
AND it will also be the most meaningful, beautiful thing I’ll ever do
So, you know...
I’m quietly confident it will balance out of the positive side of things 😉
I wonder if this is a weirdly specific metaphor for what you and I are doing in business a lot of the time: waiting in anticipation of the things we hope will be—
Sitting in the knowledge that it won’t all be easy.
Standing before a thousand different failures.
And doing it anyway, because something in us believes the change and discomfort and stretch is worth it—
Even though we don’t yet understand what about the future we’re imagining will be *most* delicious.
If this is resonating, here are three things I firmly believe will help YOU next time you take the scary, uncertain leap out of your inbetween and into that hopeful future...
Good decisions require data, so don’t expect to have it all figured out before you begin. In fact, if you try that approach, you’ll probably never make the first move...
The biggest disappointment you’ll ever face is the gap between expectations and reality, which isn’t to say you should set your sights low and roll around your business like a human reincarnation of Eeyore *but* that you should always leave at least a little room to impress yourself.
Trusting yourself to work things out is the very best skill you can have, because it’s not about getting things right the first time around, but knowing you won’t give up when you fail.
Alright, on that note, this very strange episode of pregnant-business-philosophy is done.
Awkwardly-shaped preggo-lady hugs,
Kirsty xo
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